It is most certainly daunting, and a little ironic. At one moment, you're here, and then you're there at the next. I can't help but to realize how fickle you are and how capricious your mood is. Sometimes we try our hardest to achieve a certain particular thing, and the moment it is within reach, we decide that it is much easier to let go.
Like a balloon, up away in the sky.
I don't know if you get the rationale here, but once you let go of this, you are most certainly letting go of it forever. It may not necessarily be a bad thing, I mean - you can work towards making it a good. But you must also know should there be any ramification, you need to be able to handle it yourself and remain composed.
And if you end up trying to take the balloon back, you would have wasted a lot of time and energy in doing so. You may jump towards it, or run. No matter the case, it'll be difficult.
Moreover, what makes you think you would want to keep something that you've lost before? There was a reason you chose to not work at it anymore the previous time. You may end up having worn off the use of it all and you may even endeavor in to intentionally losing it again.
Would that not be a never-ending cycle? Having to lose something you don't know how to appreciate, and wanting it back again when it's out of reach.
Here's the funny thing about humans. It's a little unsettling to hear about how we choose to love the things we don't have, and how we covet should we see others' having what we cannot grasp. Ironic how we love what we don't have and are unappreciative to the things that we possess.
It's a depressing thought but I guess we weren't all born with gratitude in our hearts.
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